masquerade; paper faces on parade

Friday, November 27, 2009

Sims flowing like a smooth river.
Murders and sunsets are gonna be easy from now on.

7:14 PM

Thursday, November 26, 2009

My best friend who's not a human being and I went shopping today.

11:31 PM

I'm really happy for you New Moon, and Imma let you finish, but Harry Potter was the best movie of all time.

11:11 PM

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

And so the answer to life, the universe and everything is to live in a hut of reed matting and to never do anything about it.

4:12 PM

Saturday, November 21, 2009

The Lion King is based on Hamlet?!

11:19 PM

Friday, November 20, 2009

Tonight I will be buried, he thinks. But tomorrow I will rise again.
Tomorrow the summer will begin.
Tomorrow my new life will begin.

Tomorrow the summer will begin.

8:48 PM

Thursday, November 19, 2009

And then I'm wondering if sub-urbanisation and counter-urbanisation is possible in the City of Dis, and can you build underground tunnels and highways and flyovers to ease traffic congestion, because it must be quite as big as our world right, to accomodate the dead in their afterlife, and how does political and social hierachy work there, and if it's the same as our world then what's the whole point, but still if I'm going there I better learn something about it...

11:08 PM

I have been banished to the Sixth Level of Hell - The City of Dis.

Level 1: Low
Level 2: High
Level 3: Moderate
Level 4: High
Level 5: High
Level 6 - The City of Dis: Very High
Level 7: Very High
Level 8: Very High
Level 9: Low
How low can you go?

Sounds good. But you can't beat Chinese Hell, it's got 18 floors.

4:25 PM

It said do what most people do.

Disorder Probability
Paranoid: Very High
Schizoid: Moderate
Schizotypal: High
Antisocial: High
Borderline: Very High
Histrionic: Moderate
Narcissistic: High
Avoidant: Very High
Dependent: Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive: High
You can take the test here.

Oh boy.

4:15 PM

shallnotreadyourblogshallnotreadyourblogewwewweww

3:07 PM

The residents of plot number 42 are a sad bunch.

3:05 PM

Atrocious soap operas.

2:59 PM

Saturday, November 14, 2009

I have a million things on my "To Do After A Levels" list,
but the first will be to practice my rain summoning,
so I can have it anywhere, any time I want,
but also stop it going where you are,
so it doesn't bother my baby
werewolf.

And hey, it's sunny now. XD

Love,
The Rain Witch

4:44 PM

"I'm glad you're out there," she whispers to the phone. "You'll always be out there, I know that. And now I'm going to pop down to Hansen's and buy a cookie for you, and some rolls, and then we'll drink coffee when you get here and you..."

She keeps stroking the telephone handle as if the phone were a purring, gray cat.

"...and you, I love you. Did you know that?"

- du&jag&du&jag

4:43 PM

You and you and you.
You, Anon. You, Zarah. You, Nils.

Now you're lying here in the grass. Together.
And now the adventure is almost over.
No, no, no. Here's where our adventure begins.
Most of it is yet to come.
The best is yet to come.
The adventure will never end.

- du&du&du

4:31 PM

You. You, Zarah.

Run! Get out of here! Hurry!

Huh? No, I can't. I can't do anything. And I don't get it, what's happening?

Go, Zarah, go! Leave him! Now!

What's going on? I don't get it. No, I can't move. Scared? No, not scared. Empty. Just empty. I don't understand anything.

Zarah!
Huh? Wait a sec...

Zarah!

- du&du&du

4:26 PM

God, you're quite the jokester, aren't you, Hannes thought.

Why did she have to come here tonight? Why right here?
Why are you letting her have sex on Nils' grave?

God, you want to punish him, right? You want to punish him for playing around with death.

God, you're a bad playwright. And a miserable director.

Lucky for me I don't believe in you, God, Hannes thinks. How could anyone believe in someone who writes such atrocious soap operas?

- du&du&du

Well said, well said.

3:08 PM

Hannes had to bite his lip. He wanted to scream, he had to press his right hand over his mouth so that no sound would escape. He whimpered, he swore softly to himself, his eyes wide, as he stared down at the moonlit stage and saw who appeared down there.

It was her.

The girl Nils had been following and pursuing for several weeks, after that meeting in the pub. His angel. His dream. It was her.

Now she was standing there, just a few feet from where Nils was buried. He couldn't see her or hear her. She was standing almost on top of him. Could he feel her steps through the earth, through the ground?

Why was she here?

She wasn't alone. No, now her boyfriend stepped into the scene too, her popular boyfriend, whose name was... No, Hannes couldn't remember, he'd heard the boyfriend's name that night in the pub but had forgotten it.

Now she was walking over to him.
Now she was kissing him.
Now she was unbuttoning her pants.

- du&du&du

2:56 PM

Hannes took a deep breath.

A tingle of little-boy excitement had made him forget his uneasy feeling for a while, but now it came back, and he shivered again.

Two hours. He looked at his watch.

He would sit here for two hours. Nils would lie buried underground for two hours, and then Hannes would dig him up again.

2:50 PM

He pulls out a wrinkled piece of paper out of his back pocket. He smoothes it out, tries in vain to flatten it, and lays it on the table in front of him. This is the result of the night's discussions with Hannes. At least, the result of the discussions that had to do with Nils' burial, which will take place tonight with Hannes' help.

There are only a few words on the piece of paper. If you saw it without knowing what if referred to, you'd think it was a shopping list or maybe a list of equipment for someone who was going to go on a little expedition.

The words on the list are:
Raingear
Boots?
Facemask
Snorkel ***SAWED OFF!
Gloves
Shovel
Hat?

Nils sits and stares at the little slip of paper for half an hour, then gets up to go to his little sister's graduation.

Tonight I will be buried, he thinks. But tomorrow I will rise again.
Tomorrow the summer will begin.
Tomorrow my new life will begin.

Tomorrow.

- du&du&du

2:28 PM

You. You, Nils.

Didn't you use to imagine what it would be like to go crazy? To kind of go a little crazy?

Yes, that's true. I would go a little crazy. Not totally crazy, not someone who sits in a padded cell with mattresses on the walls and smears feces all over himself, not someone who shuts himself off from the outside world. No, I would just be a little crazy.

Why did you want that?

I don't know. So that I would be well looked after, so I wouldn't have to take any responsibility whatsoever for myself. I'd have a bed in a Home or Nut House and wear a white jumpsuit and be surrounded by gentle people and other slightly crazy people.

But there was something else, wasn't there?

Yes. Yeah. There in the Home I would create ingenious works of crazy art. Write a novel or a collection of poetry. Paint. Create masterpieces on the walls with bits of lead stuck under my fingernails. A Wolfli, a Hill, a Munch, a Hermelin, a Dostoevsky, a...

- du&du&du

2:08 PM

"Listen and decide for yourself. You're following around a girl that you don't even know, that you've never spoken to. You followed her to Italy just to watch her. You travelled around in Italy for four days to spy on a girl like you were a twelve-year-old boy. And then, when you get home, you want me to help you out by burying you. Burying you alive, burying you in the ground. You want to know what it's like to be buried, you say. And you spent the night in a coffin. And you slept in the cemetery. Crazy or not crazy? Answer: totally crazy?"

- du&du&du

To say I envy is an understatement.

2:02 PM

"I think they looked great," Anon says after he and Magdelena have been sitting next to each other in silence in the back seat for a bit. "I almost think they looked better today. I'd like to have some over my bed too."

Magdelena tries to figure out if he's serious. It seems like he is.

"I mean yours too," Anon continues. "Your feet too. Would you...Would you like to?"

"Mmm." Magdelena nods.

"It would work with Nivea too, wouldn't it?" Anon says. "Don't you think?"

Magdelena giggles and nods in assent. A slightly hesitant giggle and a slightly hesitant nod. She seems a little distracted, Magdelena.

Then they sit there in silence. Magdelena looks at Anon; he's staring straight ahead and seems to be lost in some dream. After a while she carefully pokes his arm.

"Hey, you?"
"Hmm," Anon says, turning to look at her.
"I want some too," Magdelena whispers. "Will you come over to my place and help me?"
"Sure. I can bring Mother's Nivea too," Anon says.

Then Magdelena smiles.
Then Magdelena smiles so beautifully that Anon forgets everything else in the world.

- du&du&du

1:54 PM

"Goodbye, Anon," Miss Larsson says. " I hope you have a good summer vacation and..."

"Goodbye, Miss Larsson," Anon says, but he doesn't take the hand she's holding out to him.

The room goes all quiet, all the fidgeting and chatting and murmuring stops, everyone looks at Anon and the teacher up at the front of the room. But Anon doesn't notice, he keeps looking into Miss Larsson's eyes, he sees how a single tear slowly runs down her cheek, and yet her eyes aren't sad, no, they're something else, something Anon doesn't understand.

He wrinkles his brow and whispers so softly that only Miss Larsson can hear, "Why are you crying?"

But she doesn't respond, just keeps her eyes on Anon without looking away, and shakes her head almost imperceptibly.

"Do I get a hug?" she whispers.

Anon nods and takes a step forward toward his teacher and hugs her for a long time, hugs her tight, and his teacher is soft and smells good and Anon can feel one of her breasts against his arm.

Yes, Anon and the teacher stand there hugging until Henke yells "Yes, yes, yes" and starts making cat calls, and then several people laugh and some start applauding.

- du&du&du

12:58 PM

At least half of the girls on Sweden's national women's soccer team are lesbians. That was something that someone told me once, and it sounded like it was true. It sounded like the person who said it knew it was true. And now that thought is bugging me. What if Mia...

Would that matter?

Yes. Now and then I've thought: I would like to know someone gay. A guy. Be friends with a guy, just friends of course, without an ounce of the tension, the suspicion, the lust that gets in the way and ruins things. Every now and then it would be so nice and relaxing not to have to deal with that whole game. Now everything will be exactly the opposite with Mia. She's nice and cheerful and fun to be with. But what if she has certain intentions? What if she's here to seduce me? Then everything would come crashing down to earth. Then nothing would be worth anything anymore.

Zarah raises her wineglass again and contemplates Mia over the edge of the glass. Zarah feels like an idiot and is ashamed of her thoughts.

- du&du&du

12:45 PM

And in his head, Anon sees how he and Sara sit facing each other at her kitchen table, and he hears himself tell Sara:

My father is a god.
My mother is a normal woman,
but my father is a god.

- du&du&du

12:35 PM

A beaming smile shines in the dark, cemetery night.

Completely still, flat on his back, Nils lies there. The earth beneath him. He feels the profound coldness of the earth against his back. The entire mass of the earth under him. He can feel how it pulls.

Yes, I will come to you, he whispers. But not now, not yet. The earth pulls, the earth calls, the cold, black earth down there. Yes, I am coming. But not yet. First I'm going to live. If I may. If I may be so blessed. Give me time to live my life, please.

- du&du&du

*eurgeahh*

12:32 PM

What's there to be afraid of? Nils thinks.
Now we're alive. Then we're dead. What's there to fear?
Nothing at all, Nils thinks. Not a thing.

A mild, warm, almost gleeful happiness fills Nils' body. It starts down in his toes; then the sweet, bubbling happiness rises up to the top of his head, like when you pour champagne or sparkling wine into a champagne flute. He thinks: Here I lie in a cemetery on a May night. I am twenty years old and I am almost laughing with joy at this thought:

First we live. Then we die. There's nothing to fear.

- du&du&du

You. You, Nils. Congratulations. It's always nice to see another being realise the truth, see the light, leave the stereotype.
Yes, Memento Mori.

12:24 PM

"She spells Sara with a Z," the man said, nodding toward the list of residents. "A Z at the beginning and an H at the end. Z-A-R-A-H."

When the door clicked shut again behind the man, Nils thought: Oh, I see.
Sara is actually Zarah. I see.
A dream that begins with a Z instead.

- du&du&du

12:18 PM

Not little Rebecka today when she whispered that she wanted to show Zarah something and took Zarah out into the hall and told Zarah to cover her eyes and then Zarah was allowed to look and Rebecka was standing there beaming like a little sun and holding out a crumpled package and she said it was for Zarah because she was so nice and then gave Zarah a hug and a kiss too.

- du&du&du

12:14 PM

"I used to play Invisible Jesus."
"What?"
"Invisible Jesus. That was my best daydream. I was God's secret agent. God would come to me with his biggest problems. And I would fix them. Always."

- du&du&du

11:34 AM

Friday, November 13, 2009

Happy Friday the 13th;
It will be raining all day today.

Isn't that just wonderful?

Love,
The Rain Witch

3:31 PM

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

"You're going to spoil your comic book like that."
"Graphic novel. And it's okay, the autographed hardcover versions are at home."
"What are you reading anyway?"
"The Sandman. Neil Gaiman, mind, not the Spiderman villain.
It's so good, it isn't just a book. It's literature."

YAY Angel!

4:47 PM

OMG
she dressed up as Death for the pageant
I was just thinking about that
can I do that too can I can I can I :D

*squeals like a little girl*

4:18 PM

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

"A species may become functionally extinct when only a handful of individuals survive, which are unable to reproduce due to certain reasons."

And so we're all endangered species of ourselves.

9:22 PM

If this happens again, I swear, I'm running away to speed up my suicide.

"Research has shown that if you sleep too much or not enough, your risk of death increases significantly."
Oh boy, yet another way to die.

Even if it has quietened down quite a bit these days.

9:12 PM

Yes, but how many of them are named Steve?

And how many are still alive...
and have their mothers alive...

9:08 PM

Monday, November 2, 2009

Monday, September 29, 2008

and remember what I believe in.

9:23 PM

8:54 PM

Before anything, can you please remember your religion now.
That's an order.

8:51 PM

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Your EQ Deficiency Index has gone through the roof.

2:34 PM

When you think about "Good vs. Evil", it's easy to see which is more interesting.

Good, while good, is just plain, um, plain.

Evil, on the other hand, is Mmmm.

2:33 PM